Friday, May 20, 2011

Not Being Ready

Hey, you know what I haven't talked about in a while ?!? Women and
relationships. I don't have either, hence I don't write about it, but
hazza for I've had a moment of reflection that has shed new light on a
life time problem, I'm just not ready. It's true, as a man I'm not
ready to be in any kind of relationship, as much as I wish that wasn't
true.

I'm a romantic, holding hands, box of chocolates kinds guy and well, I
get bummed out when I see other couples hugging and stuff. I see them
and I want that with someone, to share those moments that never really
seem to matter when your in that moment.

But I've accepted that not only am I not ready for a healthy
relationship the way I am right now, I don't think I'm going to be
ready anytime soon really. I stop and think back on things I've done
or said and I realize how dumb they were. I don't regret them, but I
could have made things better, not worse.

I still have a ways to go before maturing in a healthy way. Whether
it's spiritually, mentally, emotionally and financially, seems I'm too
unbalanced to do anything with anyone. As much as I hate go admit
that. It's just not the right time for it right now, so I'll just keep
on trucking.

~ con safos ~